I’m writing this for future reference. Something to look back on when we get to April 16, 2020 and I’m still struggling despite my 11:11 Wishes. Also, New Years always comes and goes for me, I wanted to do something different.
Honestly, the most palpable, measurable thing I can and am planning on working towards are my weight loss goals. I guess it’s a pretty big reason for the large surge of posts recently.
I’ve just weighed myself for the first time in months. And I’m only 2 pounds higher than square one of my weight loss journey. Realistically, even though alot of its just bloating and water weight, the fat being present in any form agitates me.
Another resolution, is really figuring out what to do, who to be, and how to run towards that. I’m in the spring semester of my sophomore year in college. I seriously still don’t know what happiness means for me. Let alone what occupation destined for me.
I know it maybe troublesome running towards any old occupation while figuring out what I want to do job wise. I’m definitely gonna need some money and some stability.
Right about now, my future’s looking pretty rocky. This New Years has been a big reflection point in my life. So on top of looking for a job, I’m going to really take control of my life from now on.
I’m also gonna learn to take care of myself to get real change going. It’s not as hard as us lazy animals like to make it seem.
When I say real change, I not only mean good change, but something sustainable. Honestly, change made for good was only change sadness forced out of me. And none of those changes lasted.
There are arguably 3 good changes my life that happened after my mom passed that were sustainable. And each one is debatably bad and I still haven’t gained much from them.
Realistically all 3 of them lead me closer to making this blog. But even that’s debatable in terms of good or bad at this point.
Moving off that topic. If there is one thing I refuse to leave 2020 with is a car and a drivers license. I shouldn’t be walking into 2021 without direction, I should be driving towards my new job with GPS navigation. New Years 2021 will for sure look a lot better for me.
I’ll make some posts about a plan later. It is still the top of the year. I’m definitely gonna be writing down how I’m going to accomplish this stuff. I atleast want a game plan before march.