Site icon Monika Red Diary

12 day posting streak/5 day absence

I was lowkey pressuring myself to post everyday. Even if that meant doing little posts (like this one will end up being probably) each day I was too lazy to write. In all fairness, I am atleast somewhat amazed that I did it for longer than a week. Before that streak, I hadn’t even managed to do 3 days of consecutive posting.

On the flipside, I decided, instead of hitting 2 weeks and ending strong, to end it at 12 because I didn’t feel like doing another shitty 6 sentence post. I will say, I am just one woman running this damn blog. It’s more exhausting than you think.

Especially if I want to be more involved with it. I atleast want to hit 100 posts before I’m back at school. Along with work, and probable family bullshit, I predict my attendance to this site will be shotty at best, if not non-existant.

In other news, it seems like I solidified a D in my incomplete class. Passing, but upsetting for me. It was very much my fault, but in the end, she did fuck up. Could’ve gotten a C+, and if communication was better, I could’ve easily turned it around to an A+. Not a 100%, but very close. Again though, I definitely should’ve gotten more work to her by the deadline. Shit, even if I had turned it a little later than the fourth deadline she’d given me, we would be square. I feel like such a fuck up. School isn’t realy my forte anymore lol.

Speaking of which, something I never really touched on. I’m gonna be taking Calculus and Physics. I think I mentioned having to hastily choose a major. It ended up being systems engineering. I’m scared though. While I’m smarter than most people I’ve hung around, literally everyone I know say the same thing. That they were fantastic/atleast somewhat good at math until they hit Calculus. And that worries me, thought I might mention it once here.

Once again in the basement of the sorority house, so I don’t get roped into other bitches stuff. Still don’t wanna be around anybody, yet everyone wants me to hangout and act like they always wanted me around. They’re gonna be spooked when I finally ghost everyone.

Nevermind that though. I’m thinking about if I want loans or just more credit cards, so I can pay for a car.

I really don’t know what I’m doing. Sorry to veat this dead horse over and over… This is very much my father’s fault. He has some really stupid decision. He wants me to figure my own shit out after seeing how that turned out the past 5 years already.

Let’s not make this an endless bitching segment though. Just got 30 dollars in tips tonight. I ate alot before coming to work so even now, a couple hours after my shift, I’m not starving. Bout to look up if I can eat fish raw, doubt it, but I’ll see what I can find.

Back to topic though. Although its supposedly against standards I don’t even have, I’m gonna do another post streak. I’ll try to get a month long one going. I think its boosting the number of visitors/views on the site. Let me know what you think though.

Thanks for listening💋

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